Blue Beetle

⁃ Some months before release: 'Nah, it looks too mediocre, I don't even know who this Blue Beetle is. Okay, at least he has a sword from Final Fantasy!' ⁃ Some days before release: "Wow, what is it? Good rating? Now I'm hooked!" ⁃ Some minutes after leaving the cinema: "Ooohhhh........" In a few words, I didn't like it. Blue Beetle looks like a superhero origin combined with Iron Man, Venom, and Spider-Man, adding just a bit of the family dynamic from Encanto (or Fast & Furious, you decide). The only outstanding thing is the cringe factor: strange jokes, graphics that are far from the best, and a derivative plot — everything looks like it was made in the 00s. It's not bad, really; sometimes, it's even good — you'll definitely giggle if you're into this style. However, it's not enough to label the movie as a good one. P.S. While watching this one, I've finally come up with the thought that I'm always bored during the first act. All these character introductions and exposition setups look like they're for people who are watching the first movie in their life. It doesn't matter if I like the film; I'm always waiting for the real action to begin 🙁

Maybe this should just have been called the "Blue Bottle" after the annoying blowfly that buzzes around annoyingly to no apparent purpose? Susan Sarandon (why?) is the megalomanic corporate mogul "Kord" who is out to create a super-soldier ("OMAC") using an extra-terrestrial scarab that can synergise an human being with an almost indestructible endo-skeleton. Fortunately for all of us, her cleaning lady likes to use the luxury bathroom at her home, and when she is caught and quite literally dumped, she and her brother find themselves out of work and introduced to "Jenny" (Bruna Marquezine) - the strong-minded niece of our baddie - who is determined to thwart the militarisation of her daddy's company. She smuggles the gadget out of their HQ and manages to pass it to the rather earnest and drippy brother "Jaime" (Xolo Maridueña) with strict instructions not to even open the box. Of course they do, and next thing he and the glowing blue gizmo are best mates - he can fly, zip around with great speed and has, of course, super-human strength. "Cord" is determined to get it back, so she energises her already semi-mechanised henchman "Carapax" (Raoul Max Trujillo) for a gradual/glacial build up to a denouement that a bat could see from space. This has all the feel to it of a standard television movie. Great visual effects but lightning pyrotechnics, cleaving a bus in half and endless explosions are no longer enough to sell a film. There has to be some semblance of originality with the thing. Aside from it's bilinguality, this has precious little by way of innovation to shout for it. The characters are largely forgettable - especially the annoying uncle "Rudy" (George Lopez) who's astonishing adeptness with all things super-tech was just plain daft! It's also way, way too long and I felt the ominous presence of a sequel looming at the end quite sad. This is a weak story with a weak cast that seems designed to fill a gap in the USA's expanding and under-served Hispanic market. I think it may work there? I'm not so sure anyone else needs this.